I need a raise

Just back from a vacation . . . I've been told i'll be working on Monday , Wednesday and Friday. Don't know if I believe this or not. Also, I've been told that i have to have more frequent grooming. Self-esteem was hurt on that one. Also, my raise has not been approved. I'm asking for ten more cookies a day. I'm willing to jump through small hula hoops for this but as of yet, no response from the management.